Modern methods of education are based on the rejection of handcrafting. Emphasis is placed on persuading the child not to commit certain acts by means of a word. And psychologists state that beating with a belt for misdeeds in early childhood is fraught with subsequent formation in the teenager of such qualities as: cruelty, low self-esteem and sharpness. A child who is often strapped, may experience sexual disorders in the future, due to the desire to assert himself he can easily go on a crime.
But adherents of radical parenting measures may object: “What if my son or daughter doesn’t understand simple words”? Such a position is also not without foundation.
Formats of parenting
Every parent is obliged to study their child well, to find their approach, and to be able to clearly distinguish in which cases punishment will be strict and unconditional. There are two harmful extremes in parenting methods:
The first is parents practicing a soft approach. They are constantly employed at work, so they cannot devote much time to raising their children, so they allow the offspring to turn up. Dads and moms aren’t interested in school success, they don’t wonder who the child is friends with and what is into. Such parents are either afraid to punish their children or because of indifference do not strap children even for serious misdeeds and crimes.
Parents from the second category adhere to radical parenting techniques, they punish children for any (even minor) province.
Both the format of extremes negatively affect the child’s psyche. As doctors point out, with our spiritual poverty and myriad traumatic factors, more than half of children in modern society suffer from neuroses. How to be?
Is it worth
punishing a child with a belt? There are, of course, isolated misdemeanours where a “severe penalty” must be enforced. For blatant misconduct (theft, beating a peer, mocking animals and stuff) one “threatening finger” gesture is not enough. In such exceptional cases, however, the punishment cannot be reduced to cruel beatings accompanied by malice or hatred.$ It is necessary to punish calmly, loving: the child will definitely feel your love, and will definitely feel that deserves this punishment. Only under these conditions do children feel their guilt. Punishment will be beneficial.
With reasonable upbringing, children are well aware of the rules of behavior in the family, in society, in school. They realize their misdeeds and the justice of punishment, but only when it is fair. Therefore, before you punish, understand everything in detail and never act hot. Some children a couple of splashes will benefit, others the fact that his hand was raised by his mother or father (also socially), can provoke serious mental trauma.
A mother in a rush of anger (constantly spanking a child, and then constantly repentant of it) gradually loses her authority. Over time, the child may shift the concepts of “can” and “cannot”. Punishing, be sure you’re doing the right thing.
Strive to ensure that the most severe punishment for a child is the evocation of his conscience. Then any misconduct causes a sincere desire to rectify itself and ask forgiveness from those he has wronged.